By: Katie

Subject: Re: Re: Re: Weird days

Kids are inquisitive. I remember finding a stash of 'girlie mags' in my Dads wardrobe when playing a game of hide and seek. I never mentioned it but he did get rid of them later!

I think our own desire not to be found out gives a certain amount of cover. There's the obvious alias, then there is private browsing so nothing ever shows up in searches. I don't take photos as everything just goes into our family folder and everyone can see it on their phones - god that would be a mistake!

My clothes are all kept in the loft. I can't see the kids venturing up their especially as they approach their teens. Hard enough to get them to move from in front of the Xbox!

As you say as they get older they are less interested in their parents and more interested in their friends. We're just old now!

So I as long as your husband is careful I'm sure that everything will be OK and if not, well kids are pretty tolerant these days unlike many of the older generation!

Be good if you can have a chuckle about it at times. It is pretty ridiculous when you look at it but just don't laugh in a horrible way just a nice way.

By: Sindy

Subject: Re: Re: Weird days

Never too much information here lol. And my husband admits he has those guilt pangs for the same, eh hum, reason. I think this must be common for the Davina type crossdresser? And good to know crossdressing isn't always on your minds! And yep, especially with all this Brexit stuff to keep us all occupied.

And the football. Husband won't talk about that right now, lol.

Emma, that's so great you're in a good place with your husband. I need to chuckle about it more. I've just had a few issues with kids and a friend of late that has made me overthink everything else in my life. Katie brought me back to earth with discussion about perspective. I also know people battling terminal cancer and other horrors so really, where is crossdressing in the big scheme when compared to these things?

Alcohol helped too haha. Not the healthiest option but some times good to take the edge off a stressful day.

And the computer thing is maybe a fear I have as kids today are SO technically savvy. I can't imagine they won't find anything we have online or elsewhere. Then again, I never bothered to hunt down personal things of my own parents as there's that whole ick factor of not wanting to know what they get up to. I assume our kids will be the same.

Life is weird isn't it? This blog is the best thing to help wives through all this. It would be great to hear from your wife Davina but I do understand why she's also not interested if she's in a good place. Women are often better putting it aside if they've revolved the issue, otherwise doubt can make a comeback. If she's happy, let it be.

Thanks again everyone. :-)

By: Katie

Subject: Re: Re: Re: Weird days

Rather like Davina I do get those pangs of guilt after ...

But I think that most of the time my thoughts about are not about dressing itself but what my wife thinks. As I said before I've tried to communicate but barriers go up.

That's why it is great that Em has been able to start taking the dressing in her stride. I bet she feels a lot better for doing so as she can now share part of her husbands life that was otherwise out of bounds.

Katie

By: Davina

Subject: Re: Re: Re: Weird days

Nice to see you back Emma and nice update seems things are going well with you :)

By: Emma RG

Subject: Re: Re: Weird days

Love your humour Davina.

It brightens my outlook on Crossdressing as there are worse things he could be doing and at least he's not demeaning to women when he dresses as he does look quite convincing.

In the last few weeks we've got him better makeup a better wig off eBay and some lingerie and a few dresses Primark have cheap clothes for the crossdresser good enough.

I've also added to my heels and dress collection and have nice sets of matching lingerie.

Naturally he came home and straight upstairs to try things on and we had one night in the week I did his makeup which was actually fun teaching him blending and contouring etc.

I do think omg I'm in a relationship with a man who dresses as a woman but I tend to chuckle about it to myself more than fretting partly thanks to the blog and all these messages and the support page and Davinas blog.

I think I'm along the Sam lines of Davinas wife the other half is a crossdresser its just something he does

By: Davina

Subject: Re: Weird days

You women eh we think we've got you Sussed and think you've got your heads around crossdressing then you get these doubts again... I'm sure my wife must reflect on it too probably but she'd have to confirm at times when she sees me overtly macho and must think I can't believe he dresses as a woman.

I'll be brutally honest no I don't have days when I think OMG I'm A crossdresser. The brutal honest bit is this that the only time I ever think omg what am I doing lets get this gear off and return to male mode is sometimes after I orgasm if I'm feeling a bit frisky with myself when dressed... Too much info? Well that happens and I sometimes get some form of guilty pang or whatever it is and sometimes will power makes me stay dressed sometimes I'll change back immediately thinking why do I dress up, take off the make up and dress etc then 30 mins later wish I was using the time to still be chilling crossdressed.

I am a normal guy.

I lead an ordinary life but I crossdress. I think my wife's got her head around that ... Be good if she'd join in this debate to let the female readers know what it's like living with a Davina type crossdresser.

I've not hid that dressing can make one horny etc and that's the only time I may feel this why do I do it thing which doesn't last long after I ... Well you know ... Ahem... Do the business... Lol.

Why are you feeling it this week? Something said or seen?

Ah you're imagining things.

Now

We have all sorts of things in our heads at the moment:

1) Wales are playing Newzealand in the 3rd test today and we want a win.

2) Wales are playing Northern Ireland this evening ... And we want to win...

C) we've voted out of the EU how's the quid looking now?

4) it's Saturday yeses love Saturdays

And D) I've not crossdressed for a good few weeks and working from home Monday so might do it as Davina ..

What weird crossdressing thoughts do you think we have lol ...

And what weird stuff would we hoard on the computer.. I don't have weird stuff on my computer.. Oh apart from this blog in cyber space.

us Crossdressers like all men as that's what we are have similar... What the hell is she going on about now, is that another blooming handbag, they're new shoes and flat again, why oh why isn't she wearing matching lingerie with that, why do we have to go shopping, you've planned what on the weekend? Oh no home construction remodelling program on to, oh no another big looser or big brother whatever.. Lol

Then the biggest reflection why won't wives wear stockings and sexy lingerie and high heels what is wrong with them!!

Men can compartilise things and rank importance..

Wife wearing black stockings heels and basque for me highly important ... Wife asking what I want for dinner low priority.

If there are other things bothering you talk to your husband do t assume.. He may not have had one crossdressing thought enter his head in weeks.. We don't think about crossdressing g all the time .. Granted we think of sex every 6 seconds but crossdressing not so much.

So less of those negative vibes and who said my wife doesn't have negative thoughts about me crossdressing if only hint she'd tell you what she thought hint hint on here in a reply to one of these threads hint hint hint ...

I don't think she stops worrying about others finding out we have deniability based on my alpha male image unless caught red handed as Davina lol..

I have once taken a selfie on my phone to find it backed up to google+ but it's set so only I can see Google + but point taken anyone could have seen it if I wasn't more careful.

Conversely she says she hasn't but I wonder has she told other people.. Wouldn't bother me if she has but be nice to know if another family member or friend knew about my crossdressing.

Need to ask her how she tunes it out but I think she just thinks of it as something I do maybe once per month at the moment maybe once per two months, it's like fancy dress, it's still me... Maybe she will answer .. Hint.

you have not failed your kids marrying a crossdresser you married the man you love he's still the same and it doesn't matter if he dressed up as a stromtrooper or a woman in the privacy of his own home he's the same person maybe enriched by some feminine qualities we don't realise or like to admit we have.

Chill it's fine to worry and fret but stop it stop it now lol

By: Sindy

Subject: Re: Re: Weird days

Thanks Katie. Your words and the advise here really help. Perspective. That's what I'll work on.

By: Katie

Subject: Re: Weird days

I do sometime wonder about women's logic too. Probably a good reason I could never be one.

I saw the news yesterday about the father who had beaten his own daughter to death and then his wife helped hm to cover it up and make it seem like an accident.They even let her younger sister find the body to try an make it more realistic.

How does that happen?

I don't understand how anybody could abuse and kill a child but for his wife then to decide that that was acceptable behaviour and stand by him defies all logic an maternal feelings.

This whole EU referendum has opened a whole can of worms and I've seen thoroughly despicable racist views openly publicised from people who I thought were tolerant individuals.

I'd sooner be known as a crossdresser than a racist and I know my wife would feel the same. I proud that my children are tolerant and accepting of other people. They have a transgender pupil at their school and it's just normal to them that somebody could choose how they want to live their life.

Crossdressing is a small quirk and things need to be put into perspective. Our M15 training should stop any indiscretions as far as Joe Public finding out is concerned, unless of course we want them too!

As I said before I don't think you'll ever be free of these negative thoughts as long as you see crossdressing as a problem. There are a lot things worse in this life than being married to a crossdresser and so look for the positives and don't dwell on the negatives.