"You take the blue pill, the story ends. You wake up in your bed and believe whatever you want to believe. You take the red pill, you stay in Wonderland, and I show you how deep the rabbit hole goes."
As I posted in an earlier thread, what if artificially increasing testosterone levels could actually 'cure' the need to crossdress. Besides the unknown side effects I wouldn't have this urge any longer and could lead a 'normal' life making everything so much simpler.
Suddenly I gave this a lot more thought. I've been dressing in varying degrees on and off for over 40 years. It's part of who I am and if I changed that would it change me as a person? Could I risk becoming one of those men I despise because my T levels escalated? Despite everything I do enjoy crossdressing and the benefits it brings. What if I still had these stresses but no release valve?
For the first time I think that the answer would be no. It made me feel sad and even scared that I'd no longer feel the way I do when I'm dressed. I'd miss it even though I no longer had the desire. I'd want to take the red pill stay in 'Wonderland' a little while longer. After all that's who I am.
I know that the majority of wives and partners would want us to take the blue pill but what would you do faced with the dilemma? Would any wives or partners prefer we took the red pill, stayed in Wonderand and explored the rabbit hole together?
Its true I can put a pill in my mouth drink a pint of water and the pills still on my tongue lol I have to have dissolving Add to dictionary if I have a headache..
If I do have to swallow a tablet I either have to crunch it up or if its one of those capsules it takes me a few goes to get it down lol my wife has to leave the room as she always cracks up watching me trying to swallow a pill so no blue or red pills for me lol
Dissolved option - lol, you always crack me up, Davina.
I struggle to swallow pills would there be a dissolved option
I'd not take either as have a mind of my own and my mind is at ease with Crossdressing being part of my overall makeup a small occasional part of me but one that helps me unwind so I'd reject both pills and say "I am what I am"
I wouldn't even ask him to take a pill as it's part of him and in it there is something maybe deep within him that makes him who he is and I like that part of him.
Many women will not realise this but the crossdressing helps him unwind and helps him "drop the act" as he's macho but that's just an act "the real act" as you know he has a softer side which most wont see.
I've seen him happy and sad and I've seen him cry and be compassionate but we're never apart and seeing him crying at a funeral letting out his emotions he's still trying not to cry he's still trying to bottle it up in public that he's this macho hard man and they don't cry do they so his escapism from all the pretence for whatever reason as a femophile (which is a word I'm going to use a lot as think it describes you guys well) is crossdressing and if it helps him and on some level helps our relationship married to a more relaxed chilled husband why would i condone or pressure him to take a pill to stop crossdressing.
Emma (Wife of a Crossdresser) x