By: Sindy
Subject: The other side
Yes, you have been busy Davina. Great posts to read. I think it was Emma who is having girl time with her hubby though. I did that once some time back and regretted it. Emma, however, is in a good place and I'm very happy for her. Her marriage sounds stronger already.
And, carrying on from our train of thought about comparing what a man would do if his wife crossdressed, I realized we need to change the example and then you can give your thoughts. I'm not saying either that these activities are the same as crossdressing. But I think they're equally socially taboo and that's really the issue.
So...how would you react to coming home early from work one day and walking in on your wife standing in an adult sized diaper, baby bib and bonnet and sucking on a pacifier, cooing at herself in the mirror. And yes, this is an activity that women and men engage in! What are you thinking now? Maybe, a big WTF. Maybe you wonder if she's having a mental breakdown or an episode. You hope to god the children don't walk in and see their mother like this. Are the curtains drawn? What will the neighbor think? Does she think she's a baby? Is she, even worse, a pedophile? Oh god, she looks so weird like that, how will you ever get the image from your head. How can you ever be intimate with her again??
Might these thoughts not go through your head?
And then, she explains that this is something she's done forever since she snuck her baby brother's diaper as a little kid, and it's something she will continue to do forever. She can't help it as it's part of her now. Only occasionally she dresses, she loves to look through baby sites and buy baby paraphernalia and yes, it does often turn her on to see herself in a diaper. She would especially love it if you wanted to hangout with her when she dresses but she understands if you can't. She can dress when you're out. She will keep her things hidden.
Oh god, you think, now whenever I go to football practice my wife will be dragging her baby stuff from the attic and putting on her diaper. How can I concentrate knowing this??
Your head feels it might implode. You can't believe she even has dreams of going out publicly with you like this, but she also knows it's better to keep it private. You think you'd rather be seen with another man than a wife dressed as a baby! At least people understand being gay. People might think you're insane for staying married to her. That you have no backbone...or worse, that you LIKE women who dress as babies.
How can you stay married with this? What about the kids...this will screw them up. Does she expect them to keep a secret of they find out? Will she tell them? If anyone finds out they'll get bullied at school. And it's never going away. She's can't seriously do this FOREVER, can she??
Can you feel the angst here? And no, adult babies and crossdressing aren't really the same thing, BUT, both are socially taboo and span a spectrum from minor fetish to full time lifestyle. And while crossdressers have benefited from transsexuals who have given a sense of normality to your behavior, most people still don't think kindly of men presenting as women. So wives do feel completely freaked out, and heaven forbid going in public with him. It's a rare and brave woman who will do this. I'm always stunned that any woman will do this and wonder what it is about them that means they can handle it. I don't think I ever could. I always wonder what sort of man wants to be seen publicly as a crossdresser in the first place? Consider the wife in her baby outfit - if she strutted out the front door, what would you think? Might you not wonder if she was insane, or worse, some sort of public exhibitionist?
Anyway, just food for thought. How would you ultimately manage this situation? Remember, she will dress occasionally as a baby for the rest of your life together. Forever. She will need time to do this and somewhere to store all her baby gear. She will have times when all she can think about is dressing. She will want to spend your joint money on private baby things for herself. If you don't want to be involved because it ruins your attraction to her, you will need to accept she's dressing when you are doing other things. She might even want you out of the house so she can dress. And you will always know, deep down inside, that you feel repulsed when you see her like this but you also know, sadly, that she feels oddly attractive and relaxed. She likes herself this way. You wonder how such a thing can be. She is such a beautiful woman otherwise, you wonder why she wants to ruin her image and make herself look ridiculous. (This is a VERY common thought for wives of crossdressers)
So, how would you honestly feel?
By: Katie
Subject: Re: Re: Re: The other side
I honestly don't think it would phase my kids if they found out. It'd be a case of OK whatever. My two are just hitting their teens when everything becomes about them! They're not interested in what their parents get up to, think, do etc. Before that they were too young to be judgemental.
I once had a few emails with another crossdresser whose kids knew. They were both late teens and he used to be dressed when they came home. It never bothered them, all they asked was that he wasn't dressed when their mates came round.
I doubt they'd mention it to their mates because you just don't talk about your parents. Why would you?
He goes out dressed but always in another town or city far away from the family home.
I and I'm sure most of us care deeply about our children and would do everything we can to ensure that they grow up be kind and thoughtful members of society. If that means the MI5 approach then it is what we'd do. As you say family comes first, But it also helps me to be more relaxed and easy going if I can dress from time to time so to a degree the dressing benefits the whole family. A hard concept to grasp when it could also jeopardise everything but it's just getting the balance right.
I'm sure that your husband would make sacrifices for his family but it is equally important that he can continue to dress from time to time. Let of a bit of steam of you like. There are always opportunities and if not some can be manufactured.
And if things did slip and they found out it doesn't need to be a big issue. If you are both supportive of each other then that is the main thing. As with anything with the kids you need to back each other up because if they sense any split it will affect them and they may decide to take sides.
Personally I don't think kids need to know. They're not interested for starters and won't thank you. they don't want to know what they're parents get up to - especially anything that sexual. God think if you found out your parents were into bondage and wanted to talk to you about it! Even worse they dressed as babies!
If they find out by accident then be united and don't make a big deal about it. Kids these days are very accepting and if you let them know that you won't do anything to embarrass them then they'll be fine.
Maybe Davina can add an 'Ask a crossdresser a question' section. Don't know enough about the internet searches to make it come up near the top though.
By: Sindy
Subject: Re: Re: The other side
You and Davina are trying to kill me this week, LOL!!! OMG another hilarious and yet brilliant answer. I don't even know your wife and yet here I am, envisioning her in an enormous buggy. I love you guys, seriously. I needed this laugh! And I love any wife who will climb into an enormous buggy in a onesie! :-D
Such a shame there isn't some support forum out there for newly informed wives of crossdressers who can chat to guys like you here. They'd feel better in minutes. The internet is such a blessing yet also a curse...mostly a curse as the most troubled people always shout the loudest, as I've said. We wives usually only hear from the most bitter women and the most obsessive crossdressers. Neither have a healthy perspective.
Anyway, Katie, I believe you. I believe you and Davina both would try and accomodate a wife's off habit, and my husband also, who has shrugged when I've asked how he'd feel if I crossdressed and said he'd probably try and find a way to join in. Maybe men internalize things less? Seems you're less worried about your social image than we are.
I think having kids ultimately made things worse for me. I can't stomach the idea that they would suffer. I worry their father's behaviour reflects on them as other kids can be so cruel. My husband doesn't want anyone knowing, though a couple of my friends do know as I told them in confidence out of need to figure things out. My friends don't seem to care, so that's sort of cool. But kids are awful so I've had to do the unfair thing and set a rigid boundary that while they're young he can't let them find out. This means being like the CIA, lol. It's hard to suppress a natural urge I know, but I also know he made the decision to be a father and that comes first, surely? He knew about his crossdressing long before our relationship, ever since he was a kid, so he had ample opportunity to NOT marry me and have kids. He didn't have to do the family thing, so surely now, the family comes first?
Am I wrong here? I sacrifice most of my own life and interests at the moment for my young kids. I know I'll get myself back when they're older. Can't my husband do the same with his dressing? Can't he go to hotels or wherever and just keep it all very covert for a decade or two? Or is this impossible? (And yes, he's being very considerate at the moment but things have been known to slip...)
I accept his dressing but I also think, being a Davina Dresser, that it's inappropriate for family life. So I couldn't keep the marriage together if he dressed around the kids. He says he doesn't want that anyway. It just sucks to have this 'what if' always hanging over the relationship.
Anyway, am I being selfish?
By: Katie
Subject: Re: The other side
What would I do if I came home and found my wife in an adult nappy pretending to be a baby?
As you say first reaction would be WTF. I may well laugh not because it’s funny but just out of the absurdity of the situation.
I’d then want to sit down and talk to her to find out why, when etc.
I’m sure they’d be tears and she’d be worried that I might leave her, that I’d tell her family and friends, that the kids would find out and think less of her for doing it.
I’d then try and find out a bit more about it. What drives people to dress as babies, I’m sure it’s out of some psychological need to regress to childhood when they were happy. Losing all the pressures of adult life? Is it a coping strategy?
It may then make sense why I found ‘mothercare’ in the search history so often when our kids have been out of nappies for years!
Would I want to join in? No. But then again I haven’t dressed as a baby since I was – a baby. I may like to put on shorts and a T shirt and act as a kids for a bit (playing football) but that’s not quite the same. Most of the time I’m just dressed normally and in a way that wouldn’t appeal to her.
Would I indulge her hobby? I wouldn’t want to burp her and they’d definitely be no nappy changes. If she wanted to wear a ‘onesie’ (after all they are just an adult baby grow) I wouldn’t mind provided she didn’t go out in it!
I’m not sure I’d be too worried about what she was doing whilst I was out. After all if I’m not willing to join in then I realise that she must have some private time to indulge her fantasy. And I know that it makes her happy and more relaxed which makes her a better person to live with so that’s got to be a positive? We may even have a secret code so she can text me when she’s playing ‘tiny tears’ so I don’t get any nasty surprises.
What happens if the kids find out? Well most of the time they’re stuck in their own little world to care about what their parents get up to. And if they did find her well I’m sure that we could explain mummy’s little habit. It doesn’t stop mummy loving them and less and we’re sorry they found out like they did but we just felt it was a private matter between mummy and daddy.
What if she wanted top go out dressed as a baby? Well I’m sure they’d be no ‘passing’ in this case. I know some babies can be big but not 5’7’’ and 9st just won’t pass. Besides I don’t think you can get buggies that big! Maybe she could go to support group ‘Babies R Us’ where she can talk to like-minded people. It maybe enough. If not there is always Halloween!
I know hundreds of people and I’m sure that many of them have kinks. I’m just never likely to find out and if I did would I think anything less of them? Would I break friendships over it? Would family disown them? Unless it was something socially damaging (affecting children) I think most people would just laugh it off. There maybe a little sniggering and gossip but eventually it’d die down.
As she says dressing as a baby doesn’t really harm anyone. Kids may just find it amusing and funny. Old ladies maybe shocked to find out that the big bundle of joy is really an adult. Teenage girls would snigger and point but most people my just ignore it if they could ever be bothered to look up from the phone or whatever else was on their mind. I can’t really remember seeing any adult babies hanging around Mothercare. You’ll get the occasional stag weekend where the groom to be is dressed as a baby but that’s not really the same.
I know that my wife has explained that it is something she has done since she was young and that she’s tried to stop on loads of occasion but it doesn’t harm anyone and it helps her to de-stress so why not? I know it’ll be something that waxes and wanes. She said that after we got married and had kids the need to dress as a baby stopped but it’s only since the kids have grown up and she’s having to deal with their teenage mood swings that she found herself having to put on a nappy again.
I know that it maybe something she needs to do all her life and ironically she may end up in a nappy when she’s really old! I don’t like seeing her dressed as a baby but I know she needs to do it for her own sanity so I tolerate it. It’s only a small part of her life and she’s a loving wife and great mother so it’s something we’ll work on.
I do have this mental image of her in her nappy. It makes me chuckle to myself at times. Who knows in future I might even buy her a dummy and spend an evening spoon-feeding her!
By: Katie
Subject: Re: Re: Re: The other side
As always it get back to what is normal and what is not.
Until recently it wasn't considered that being gay was normal. But only around 1.1% of the UK population is gay but it is now considered a normal sexual orientation.
Go back even further and left handers were considered freaks. People had the hands tide behind their backs to force them to use there right hands. Around 10% of the UK population is left handed.
Crossdressing is considered normal sexual behaviour by psychologist. Around 10% of the male population are reported to crossdress.
It is only society that needs to catch up to make it 'social acceptable'. Then it will be normal.
Crossdressers have to normalise their behaviour. If we did't we'd go crazy and the number of suicides would rocket. The highest rate of suicide for a group is amongst transgender women. i know that it is a different issue but not to far away to be taken seriously. I do think that denying the ability to crossdress could cause the pressure cooker to explode.
By: Davina
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: The other side
OMG I cant believe you're laughing at my serious well thought out response!! lol.
I can't take Crossdressing too seriously as it's important but in the grand scheme of things not important as you point out.
Far worse things to worry about like the state of Politics and corruption world wide, abuse, terrorism, controlled media and people trying to start WW3!!
Crossdressing Sissy types? not sure I really understand what this is.. I mean i'd be willing to be submissive as Davina but don't think that makes me a sissy... I hope not anyway.
Glad you see my responses for what they are meant to mean as some people read things into what I type and get upperty and upset reading things different to my meaning and I find myself quite eloquent so don't understand why but we seem to be on the same wavelength..
I've not been crossdressed for a good few weeks but have thought about it but not all the time as you say life goes on there are more important things to worry about but occasionally I might think of crossdressing but we don't think of dressing up 24/7.. Think I might shave off the designer stubble and work from home one day this week probably Tuesday and dress up.. maybe maybe not depends how I feel.
Urge more to do with not having dressed for ages more than anything.. I miss it lol
Glad to see people being more open minded and realising its not that bad there are worse things we could be doing... like dressing as babies lol
By: Sindy
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: The other side
Ok, serious question aside, I'm seriously dying of laughter over here!. Swear to god, Davina, you can snap me out of any overthinking in one sentence. Best answer ever! hahaha.
And thanks for even giving it a go. Of course dressing as a baby is a league of its own. Mostly because of the HUGE transgression needed to do such a thing. Though, I also think you could plonk the crossdressing 'sissy' types in there and you'll not want to hear this part, but research a little further and you'll discover that MANY adult babies are also sissy crossdressers. So they can't be that far removed, can they? Though, my bet is the Davina Dresser and the sissy are not related. So I do get your confusion here haha.
Still laughing. This is one of the best comments - 'I’d think go for it and people would think you’re a looney.'
That was about the wife heading out the door fully dressed. You know, your attitude is what I needed to hear and that's really why I asked the question. I actually could see you responding this way to a wife with an unusual 'hobby' and finding a way to accommodate her. I also think you're right with one other particular comment and it should be printed all over cross dressing support forums everywhere - ' they'll think she's insane and I'm a saint.' I love this. Not because I think you're insane but because it lifts the worry wives have about their own image. Funny how it takes a guy to show how much we internalise this stuff. Fact is, this is exactly how it would play out. If anyone saw my husband dressed as a woman, I logically worry that they will judge me. Whereas I know in reality that they would assume my husband was nuts and I was super sympathetic and accepting. I would be seen as the 'saint'. All crossdressers wives would get this label I'm sure. And dammit. We deserve it. :-)
I have to also remember, and so do other wives, that our husbands are all grown men and can make their own decisions whether to be seen as a crossdresser or not. If people point and laugh, that's their choice. It's not ours. And the behaviour doesn't reflect on us as you've rightly pointed out. We wives would instead get sympathy and even respect. What our husbands get is hardly our issue. I didn't marry my husband to join some crossdressing rights movement or to worry who thinks he's nuts. I am active in what, in my mind, are far more important movements and don't have time for this one. So if people laugh at him, he made that choice to be seen that way. I don't agree with the bigotry, but as I wrote before, I consider other issues of far higher importance. It's impossible to care whether my husband can wear women's clothing freely when, as am example, children and animals are being so regularly abused. My husband really needs to understand that I get he needs to do this, but I'll never consider it important.
Anyway, serious issues aside, thanks for the laugh. My stomach actually hurts! :-D
By: Davina
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: The other side
A bit more time to write on this new query
The blog is firmly about crossdressing but OK change the example no problem and I’ll give it my best shot at a reply and I expect Katie will also and maybe we can encourage one or two other readers to chip in..
“How would I react to coming home early from work one day and walking in on my wife standing in an adult sized diaper, baby bib and bonnet and sucking on a pacifier, cooing at herself in the mirror”
Initial though and reaction “WTF?” and I’d probably laugh at her, then I’d ask “What’s this all about?” linking it in my mind to some sort of mental breakdown. So your assumptions are right and yes I would hope the children don't walk in and see their mother like this, you are correct Sindy but i'd be no different to anyone else here.
However I’d not think what will the neighbour think? As no way of them finding out… Does she think she's a baby? I don’t think would cross my mind either… Is she, even worse, a pedophile? Again if you hadn’t written it here would never have crossed my mind…
My main concern would be is she having some sort of mental episode..? I may think she looks so weird like that, how will I ever get the image from my head – I’m sure after rational conversation that wouldn’t be a problem to remove from my head but hard to say as my wife doesnt do it lol.
How can we ever be intimate again?? Again no problem even if she said its something she has to do we wouldn’t be intimate with her dressed as a baby.
I know you said take that I’m a crossdresser out of the equation but people dressing as babies is a whole other Galaxy from Crossdressing and a lot more worrying.
Let me ask you the same question “You come in from work and find your husband in the foetal position dressed as a baby” wouldn’t you rather find him crossdressed?
On the subject of it being a turn on to dress as a baby I’ve done a quick recon on line and only read one sites info but haven’t seen anything indicating its a turn on for people who do it.
This would be very strange and worrying and again easier to see why a man dressed as a woman would be turned on very easy to see as I’ve said we’re turned on by images and material things like sexy lingerie, red lips, long legs, stockings and high heels etc but as a baby that would be very weird and may lead eventually to the peado thought coming into play which would definitely be a marriage ender and revulsion in the peado case.
Would I want to be around her dressed as a baby? Probably not but it would depend on our further conversations and if this was a sheer coping mechanism for her or something else which we would work on together to resolve with the hope of weaning her away from it as a wife may do with crossdressing but as explained in the blog I think we could find compromise with crossdressing but would be harder to understand the new example a man or woman dressing as a baby – the reasons for crossdressing far outweigh the baby scenario.
If you want the relationship and love to continue you would have to work through it.
Honestly if when I left the house she wanted to dress up that would be upto her..
Do people who dress as babies dream of going out publicly?
I don’t think People might think I’m insane for staying married to her maybe in this case the opposite thinking shes insane and I’m a saint. I’m sure people wouldn’t think that I LIKE women who dress as babies.
How can you stay married with this? Communication maybe therapy but again crossdressing v dressing as a baby booom another galaxy.
What about the kids...this will screw them up. Wouldn’t need to know
Does she expect them to keep a secret of they find out? Yes
Will she tell them? Only if we agreed on it
If anyone finds out they'll get bullied at school. Probably
And it's never going away. She's can't seriously do this FOREVER, can she?? Who knows as its not a topic I know about..
Crossdressers haven’t benefited from transsexuals they have only given given a sense of normality to transsexualism not Crossdressing which is shunned by women and transsexuals.
Most people still don't think kindly of men presenting as women “crossdressing” due to the social stigma and misconception around crossdressing being weird, perverted, gay! Which it isn’t but I’m never going to solve this – Men can marry men, men can have sex changes but straight married men cannot dress as women?
I know wives feel completely freaked out, and heaven forbid going in public with him however communication communication communication – No point burying your head in the sand and its hard to talk about and hard to start a conversation about but it’s got to happen and needs to be as understood as possible to maintain a relationship and sad to see relationships end as communication was poor or didn’t happen.
Some women will as you say go out with her man dressed as a woman and yes shes brave but also maybe she can see past the social stigma and realises its still her man dressed and presenting differently and getting their head around it with good communication a lot of women who go out with their men dressed find it fun and find that socialising with others is fun and friendly from what I’ve read and chatted about with other Rgs who go out with their other halves.
What sort of man wants to be seen publicly as a crossdresser in the first place? Maybe one who is going through the many stages I discuss in my blog and has got to a stage where I’m at got bored with it and wonders what it would be like to go out and does it.. Just a curiosity thing I guess - What would it feel like? Would I pass? Etc WE’d need a reply off a man reading this blog who has gone out or goes out crossdressed.. Feel free to chip in guys.
Considering the wife in her baby outfit - if she strutted out the front door, what would I think?
I’d think go for it and people would think you’re a looney. Yes I’d wonder if she was insane, or some sort of public exhibitionist, but she doesnt dress as a baby and I dont know enough about this subject to really give accurate feedback but I still think dressing as a baby or a furry (never even heard of this occuring) is a quantum leap away from a man dressing up as a woman its on another galaxy away from something as simple as a man crossdressed psycologically and in practise.
How would you ultimately manage this situation? Via open honest communication as I said if there is love and outside this weird thing a good relationship we'd work through it.
A crossdresser is the same man just presented differently "occasionally" for many reasons and when crossdressed is still that same man..
She will dress occasionally as a baby for the rest of your life together. Compromise if its something she has to do to remain sane at other times if its an occassional thing who knows
She will need time to do this and somewhere to store all her baby gear. Compromise
She will want to spend your joint money on private baby things for herself. Compromise
You also know, sadly, that she feels oddly attractive and relaxed. Thats a good thing isn’t it to feel relaxed but again I dont see how someone could feel attractive dressed as a baby? Far easier to see why a man may feel attractive dressed as a woman.
You wonder why she wants to ruin her image and make herself look ridiculous. (This is a VERY common thought for wives of crossdressers) – But not all crossdressers look ridiculous.
The baby dressing thing is plain weird and nothing at all like men dressing as a woman so to you yes part of the problem is crossdressers normalise the behaviour in their own head and over time even start to believe it's ordinary.
It’s something we worry about for years but ultimately come to terms with I’ll never know why I crossdress fully but I enjoy it and I’m doing no harm and if society thought men in dresses and makeup was the norm, it is very occassional (since Jan 16 I’ve dressed about 3 times would I dress more given the opportunity – probably yes but it has to be practical and I know when I next get time if I get the urge I may dress and a wash of calm will flow over me but then i’ll undress and i’m still me)
I’d not be doing anything weird to me and it is way less weird to dress as a woman than a baby because dressing as a baby IS creepy and not one person in the world would say otherwise that’s how far apart the two things are.
I bet 100% and I’m not a betting man you ask a room full of mixed strangers what’s more creepy or what would you prefer to find your husband doing and 100% would say crossdressing as opposed to dressed as a baby and that’s not me a crossdresser saying that that’s me a human being.
I get that the question is to get us to see how it is on your side when you discover your husband or boyfriend is a crossdresser and how weird and difficult it is to be married to a crossdresser but I think the example of dressing as an adult baby is off the chart compared to crossdressing.
(It's truly isn’t a close comparison to crossdressing)
I find it easier to explain why men can pretend to be another gender and it's easier to conclude it may be OK as we’ve come on leaps and bounds discussing crossdressing here in this blog … Pretending to be another age is one thing.. I see plenty of women “Mutton dressed as lamb I believe is the expression” lol but pretending to be a baby is far more distressing and psychological than dressing up as a woman as is dressing up as another species as yes you've then crossed a line into weirdo land as this involved behaving like an animal also?
Behaving like a woman is far more practical.. Ironing, cooking, cleaning etc lol
I haven’t let bias affect my answer and thats me being honest thinking about this from my wifes perspective had I done something as weird as dressing as a baby which I cant even comprehend compared to Crossdressing.
I just cannot imagine an adult baby is the same as a crossdresser it’s worlds apart psychologically but a good post to get us thinking.
By: Sindy
Subject: Re: Re: Re: The other side
But wanted to add, I'm in a MUCH better place personally, even with the downer days in between, and I have you here to thank. :-)
I'm only putting thoughts and questions out there now to help my own curiosity and to help us all understand each other and ourselves a little better. I know I've had much self reflection since being here. Maybe something I ask will trigger the same in others. Or not. Either way, the sharing of questions, information and stories is priceless. I hope no one here takes any offense from my curiosity.
It's a sign of endearment I promise. I only harass those I like! :-)
By: Sindy
Subject: Re: Re: The other side
I think that's part of the problem. I think men who crossdress normalise the behavior in their own head and over time even start to believe it's ordinary. So crossdressers might convince themselves that it's way less weird to dress as a woman than a baby because dressing as a baby is creepy. Um, no. I swear everyone else who isn't in on the trans or kink radar thinks it's equally weird and creepy to pretend to be another gender. I really hate writing that as my husband is included here, but it's a fact. Look at the U.S. - their tolerance is lessening over time and being reflected in barbaric new bathroom laws etc. Sad, but true. :-(
Anyway, the point of my post wasn't to throw stones. It was to help you see how it is on this side and it IS as weird and difficult as the guy married to the adult baby wife. (It's truly the only close comparison as women don't cross dress) And yes, adult babies apparently are often turned on by their dressing, but it's also an 'identity' as much as yours is. Furries are another subset where people like to be seen as animals. Truly, I find it intriguing that men can pretend to be another gender and that's apparently okay, but pretend to be another age or species and you've crossed a line into weirdo land. Really??
Anyway, don't let bias affect your answer. Imagine an adult baby is the same as a crossdresser and THEN respond. That's the answer I'm interested in. :-)
By: Davina
Subject: Re: The other side
Sindy My blog was referring to your one girls night in attempt, I know Emma and her partner have had a few girls nights in and shopping trips and really found rapid acceptance.
I will reply about the baby dressing later when I have more time.
What I would do is look to research it on line if it was something my wife did. Do people get turned on doing it? That's something I wouldn't expect if that is true, but easier to see why a bloke would be turned on dressed as a woman wearing things us visually stimulated men find attractive and a turn on.
I think the only comparison to make between Crossdressing and dressing as a baby is it's both thought of as odd but the baby scenario would be thought more odd and psychologically different to crossdressing.
Not something I've looked into or thought about although you have drawn similar questions.. I would think crossdressing the easier to work with.