"I used to think resentment was the number one predictor of divorce, but I’ve recently changed my mind. If a person is resentful, forgiveness is possible. Or the couple could change the behavior that precipitated resentment in the first place. It’s a lot easier to forgive someone if the person quits hurting you!"

That is a quote from a counseling article I read today, entirely non crossdressing related, but sort of sealed my fate when I stumbled on it. That part about forgiving if they quit hurting you...wow, epiphany. My husband can't do that. What hurts me is innate to him and he will never stop. He has NEVER once apologised for bringing this into my life. Never. Instead, all my flaws have always been on review, and he's always subconsciously compared his 'female' self to me, of this I'm sure. Seriously, ten years ago, that was a joke. I was still bloody hot and his fake self could not compete! But I know secretly he was competing. And he was jealous - of my friends and whatever. My husband had very little sexual interest in me when I was a smoking hot 26 year old with a killer body. He was so busy being depressed and hiding away to dress up.

Now, I have no respect for him and if we didn't have kids, I'd be gone. There it is. And it's a new year folks, and I wonder where this thought train will lead...