Here's one for the T-Girls who haven't come out to anyone.. I'm a secret crossdresser..

It's understandable to feel the need to keep your crossdressing a secret. Many people do, and there can be various reasons for this:

* Fear of Judgment: Concerns about how others might react, such as family, friends, or colleagues.

* Fear of Rejection: Worries about being rejected or losing relationships due to crossdressing.

* Social Stigma: The fear of facing social stigma or discrimination.

* Privacy and Personal Preference: Simply preferring to keep this aspect of your life private.

It's important to remember that:

* You are not alone: Many people crossdress in private, and you are not the only one.

* Your feelings are valid: It's okay to feel hesitant or unsure about disclosing your crossdressing.

* There are resources available: If you're feeling isolated or need support, there are online communities and support groups for crossdressers.

If you're considering disclosing your crossdressing to others, it's crucial to:

* Choose who to tell carefully: Start with someone you trust and who you believe will be supportive.

* Choose the right time and place: Find a comfortable and private setting for the conversation.

* Be prepared for different reactions: Not everyone will react the same way, and it's important to be prepared for a range of responses.

Ultimately, the decision of whether or not to disclose your crossdressing is entirely yours. There is no right or wrong answer, and it's important to do what feels right for you.

If you'd like to explore resources or connect with others who crossdress, I can provide you with some helpful links.

I saw this one on Reddit where a wife was upset that clothes she was discarding to a charity shop were intercepted by her husband for his use crossdressing and she wasn't happy about it.

Here's what Gemini says.

It really depends on your wife's feelings and the specific circumstances. Here's a breakdown of factors to consider:

* Her Feelings:

* Is she truly discarding them? Is she genuinely no longer using the clothes, or is she just moving them out of sight?

* How does she feel about you using them? Is she okay with it? Does it make her uncomfortable?

* Has she explicitly offered them to you? This is the clearest indication that it's okay.

* Your Relationship:

* Open Communication: The most important thing is open and honest communication with your wife. Discuss your interest in using her discarded clothes.

* Respect Her Boundaries: If she's not comfortable with it, respect her wishes. Find other ways to acquire clothing for crossdressing.

* Practical Considerations:

* Will she miss them? If she might regret discarding them later, it might be best to find alternative sources.

Here are some alternative ways to acquire clothing:

* Thrift Stores: A great source of affordable and stylish clothing.

* Consignment Shops: You can often find high-quality clothing at reasonable prices.

* Online Retailers: Many online retailers offer a wide variety of women's clothing.

Ultimately, the key is to respect your wife's feelings and prioritize open communication within your relationship.

NoDisclaimer: This information is for general knowledge and informational purposes only and does not constitute professional advice.

My wife is worried I'll present more as a woman and get found out .

Geminis response

It sounds like your wife is experiencing some anxiety about your crossdressing. Here are a few things you can do to address her concerns:

* Open and Honest Communication:

* Have a calm and open conversation: Explain to her why crossdressing is important to you and how it makes you feel.

* Listen to her concerns: Acknowledge her fears and try to understand where they are coming from.

* Reassure her about your commitment to your relationship: Emphasize that your crossdressing does not diminish your love for her or your commitment to your marriage.

* Set Boundaries and Expectations:

* Discuss how often you plan to crossdress: Be transparent about how often you envision yourself presenting as a woman.

* Establish clear boundaries: Discuss what level of disclosure you are comfortable with regarding your crossdressing.

* Respect her boundaries: If she has concerns about others finding out, respect her wishes and take steps to maintain privacy.

* Seek Support:

* Couples Therapy: A therapist specializing in gender and sexuality can provide a safe and supportive space for you and your wife to discuss your concerns and work through any challenges.

* Support Groups: Consider attending support groups for couples where one partner crossdresses. These groups can offer valuable insights and coping strategies.

* Focus on Self-Care:

* Prioritize your well-being: Make sure you are taking care of yourself both physically and emotionally.

* Engage in activities that you enjoy: This can help reduce stress and improve your overall well-being.

Remember that building trust and open communication is crucial in any relationship. By addressing your wife's concerns with empathy and understanding, you can work together to find a way forward that works for both of you.

It's important to note that every relationship is different, and what works for one couple may not work for another.

Disclaimer: This information is for general knowledge and informational purposes only and does not constitute professional advice.

Another for Gemini I sometimes feel better when I crossdress and escape my male life for a bit

That's great to hear! It sounds like crossdressing brings you a sense of joy, comfort, and self-acceptance.

Here are a few things to keep in mind:

* Self-expression: Crossdressing can be a powerful form of self-expression, allowing you to explore and express different aspects of your identity.

* Self-discovery: It can be a journey of self-discovery, helping you understand yourself and what makes you feel most comfortable and authentic.

* Self-care: Prioritize your well-being. Engage in activities that bring you joy and make you feel good about yourself, whether it's crossdressing, pursuing hobbies, or spending time with loved ones.

If you're comfortable, you could also consider:

* Exploring your gender identity: Crossdressing can sometimes be associated with different gender identities, such as transgender or gender fluid.

* Connecting with others: Support groups or online communities can offer a sense of belonging and understanding.

Remember that your journey is unique, and there's no single "right" way to experience it. Be patient with yourself, explore your identity at your own pace, and prioritize your well-being.

If you'd like to learn more about gender identity or explore resources, I can provide you with some helpful links.

Another query why do I crossdress?

It's great that you're exploring your identity! There's no single answer to why someone crossdresses, as it's a deeply personal experience. Here are some possible reasons:

* Self-expression: Crossdressing can be a powerful form of self-expression, allowing individuals to explore and express their gender identity or explore different aspects of themselves.

* Creativity and fun: For some, it's a creative outlet, a way to play with gender roles, and simply have fun with fashion and appearance.

* Comfort and confidence: Crossdressing can make some people feel more comfortable and confident in their own skin.

* Exploration: It can be a way to explore different facets of one's personality and discover new aspects of themselves.

* Sexual exploration: For some, crossdressing can be a part of their sexual expression and exploration.

It's important to remember that there's no right or wrong reason to crossdress. It's a personal journey, and everyone's experience is unique.

If you're curious to learn more about your motivations, consider:

* Keeping a journal: Reflecting on your feelings and experiences while crossdressing can provide valuable insights.

* Talking to a therapist or counselor: A mental health professional can provide a safe and supportive space to explore your identity and any underlying concerns.

* Connecting with other people who crossdress: Support groups or online communities can offer a sense of belonging and understanding.

Ultimately, the most important thing is to be true to yourself and embrace what makes you feel comfortable and happy.

To summarise I think Gemini is a great tool as it's hit some key words and given some good advice .. I wish wed had Gemini when I came out to Esme to answer both our questions about my crossdressing.. I'm sure there are many more questions to ask which we can post in this thread.

If I can't crossdress I'll sometimes wear women's panties/knickers under male clothing it's so comfortable and a reminder in some way of my other side so was interested in seeing what Gemini thought..

Yes, absolutely! There's no right or wrong way to express yourself, and if wearing women's panties under male clothing makes you feel comfortable or confident, then there's no reason you shouldn't.

Here are a few things to keep in mind:

* It's your body, your choice: How you dress is entirely up to you. There are no rules or restrictions.

* Comfort is key: Choose underwear that feels comfortable and fits well.

* Explore and experiment: Try different styles and brands to find what you like best.

Ultimately, the most important thing is that you feel good in what you're wearing.

Disclaimer: This information is for general knowledge and informational purposes only. For advice or diagnosis, consult a professional.

Taking this further my wife won't wear sexy lingerie I enjoy wearing myself am I compensating?

It's not necessarily "compensating" if you want to wear sexy lingerie yourself, even if your wife isn't interested. Here's why:

* Self-expression: Wearing lingerie can be a form of self-expression and exploration. It can be empowering and boost your self-confidence.

* Spicing things up: It can be a way to add a bit of excitement and spice to your relationship, even if your wife isn't participating.

* Exploring your own sexuality: It's an opportunity to explore your own desires and fantasies.

However, it's important to be mindful of your wife's feelings.

* Open communication: Talk to her about your desire to wear lingerie. Explain that it's something you're interested in exploring for yourself and see how she reacts.

* Focus on mutual pleasure: If she's not comfortable with you wearing lingerie around her, explore other ways to incorporate it into your relationship that are mutually agreeable. Perhaps you could wear it for yourself in private or find other ways to express your sexuality together.

Remember:

* Respect her boundaries: If she's not comfortable with it, respect her decision.

* Focus on mutual pleasure: The goal should be to find ways to enjoy intimacy that are mutually pleasurable for both of you.

* Communication is key: Open and honest communication is essential for a healthy and fulfilling relationship.

Ultimately, the most important thing is to find ways to enjoy intimacy that are fulfilling for both of you.

Disclaimer: This information is for general knowledge and informational purposes only. For advice or diagnosis, consult a professional.

A common crossdresser query.. my wife won't wear sexy lingerie why????

It's completely understandable if your wife isn't interested in wearing sexy lingerie. Here are a few things to keep in mind:

* Comfort is Key: For many women, comfort is a top priority. Lingerie can sometimes be uncomfortable, impractical, or even restrictive.

* Body Image: Some women may feel self-conscious or insecure about their bodies, and wearing lingerie can amplify those feelings.

* Personal Preference: Simply put, some women just don't enjoy wearing lingerie. It's a matter of personal preference.

* Focus on Connection: Instead of focusing on lingerie, try to focus on other ways to connect with your wife on an intimate level. This could include:

* Open communication: Talk openly and honestly about your desires and needs.

* Shared experiences: Explore other ways to spice things up, such as trying new things in the bedroom, going on romantic dates, or simply spending quality time together.

* Focus on intimacy: Intimacy goes beyond physical appearance. Focus on emotional intimacy, cuddling, and other forms of physical affection.

Remember:

* Respect her decision: If your wife is not interested in wearing lingerie, it's important to respect her decision.

* Focus on mutual pleasure: The goal should be to find ways to enjoy intimacy that are mutually pleasurable for both of you.

* Communication is key: Open and honest communication is essential for a healthy and fulfilling relationship.

If you're struggling to understand your wife's perspective, consider having an open and honest conversation with her about her feelings and preferences.

Disclaimer: This information is for general knowledge and informational purposes only. For advice or diagnosis, consult a professional.

I asked Geminis opinion as a wife stating my hubby dresses as a woman when working from home..

This situation presents a unique set of circumstances and feelings. It's important to remember that everyone's experience with gender expression is different, and there's no single "right" way to feel or react.

Here are some things to consider:

* Communication is Key: The most important thing is open and honest communication with your husband. Discuss his motivations for cross-dressing while working from home. Does it make him feel more comfortable and productive? Does it help him express himself more authentically?

* Address Your Concerns: If you have concerns about his safety, potential social stigma, or how it might impact your relationship, express them calmly and respectfully.

* Respect His Expression: It's crucial to respect his right to express himself authentically, even if you don't fully understand or agree with it.

* Set Boundaries: If you have concerns about privacy or the appropriateness of his attire while working from home, discuss setting clear boundaries together.

* Seek Support: If you're struggling to cope with these feelings or if you have concerns about your relationship, consider seeking support from a therapist or counselor. They can provide a safe space to explore your emotions and offer guidance on navigating this aspect of your relationship.

Remember, every relationship is unique, and there is no one-size-fits-all answer. Be patient with yourself and your husband, and be willing to work together to find a way to navigate this aspect of your relationship that works for both of you.

Again knowing Esme's thoughts on this going out was probably a one off so said to Gemini I don't think I'd go out with him crossdressed again and here was the response

That's completely understandable. It's okay to have your own boundaries and to feel uncomfortable about certain situations.

Here are some things to consider:

* Your comfort level: Prioritize your own comfort and well-being. If you're not comfortable going out in public with him while he is cross-dressed, it's okay to say no.

* Alternative ways to support him: You can still support him in his cross-dressing journey in other ways, such as:

* Helping him choose outfits.

* Doing his makeup.

* Providing a safe and supportive space for him to express himself.

* Joining him for other activities related to his cross-dressing, such as shopping for clothes or attending a drag show.

* Communication is key: Talk openly and honestly with your husband about your feelings. Explain that you're not comfortable going out in public with him while he is cross-dressed, but emphasize that this doesn't change your love and support for him.

It's important to find a balance that works for both of you. Respect his desire to express himself, while also respecting your own boundaries and comfort level.

Remember, every relationship is unique, and there is no one-size-fits-all solution. Be patient with yourself and your husband, and be willing to work together to find a way to navigate this aspect of your relationship that works for both of you.

Geminis response to this

It sounds like it was a mixed bag of emotions for both of you.

It's understandable that you were nervous. Going out in public while cross-dressing can be a daunting experience, especially with the fear of judgment or unwanted attention. It's great that you were there to support him and that your presence helped him feel more confident.

For him, it seems like a significant milestone. It's wonderful that he felt excited and that it was a fulfilling experience for him.

It's okay that you're not sure you'd do it again. It's important to be honest with yourself about your own comfort level.

Perhaps you could explore other ways to support him in his cross-dressing journey, such as helping him choose outfits, doing his makeup, or simply being a supportive and understanding partner.

Remember, communication is key. Keep talking openly and honestly about your feelings and experiences.

Continuing this one from Esme's thoughts when we've discussed this and my own thoughts.

I felt nervous about going out with my husband crossdressed, I was scared people may realise he was a man dressed as a woman. Realising no one knew he was a man I was more relaxed and afterwards it was an experience but I'm not sure I'd do it again with him

For him he felt excitement, it was a bucket list thing to be out in public crossdressed and he was grateful I was there with him whilst he was crossdresser it made him feel safer and more confident having my blessing to do it and also my assurance that he looked good enough to pass as a woman in public.

We didn't encounter any unexpected reactions from anyone.

Next I asked or quoted I went out with my husband crossdressed and Gemini came back with questions.

That's an interesting experience! How did it go? Did you enjoy yourselves?

It's important to remember that everyone's experience with cross-dressing is unique.

If you're comfortable sharing, I'm curious to hear about:

* Your feelings: How did you feel before, during, and after going out?

* Your husband's experience: How did he feel about the experience? Did he enjoy himself?

* Any unexpected challenges or surprises: Did you encounter any unexpected reactions from others? Did you learn anything new about yourselves or your relationship?

I'm here to listen without judgment.

There are many trans events around the UK some attend. I've never attended one but think it would be a safer space than out in public maybe and something I may try one day meeting others I chat to on line socially but I'd only do this with my wife's blessing and would ideally attend with her so she can see it's harmless no different to cosplay meet ups ok maybe a little different but this is Geminis advice.

It's understandable to have questions and concerns if your husband wants to attend a trans event while cross-dressed. Here's a breakdown of things to consider:

* Communication is Key: The most important thing is open and honest communication with your husband. Discuss his motivations for wanting to attend the event. Is he seeking community, support, or a different kind of experience?

* Address Your Concerns: If you have concerns about his safety, potential social stigma, or how it might impact your relationship, express them calmly and respectfully.

* Respect and Understanding: It's crucial to approach this with respect and understanding. Trans events are spaces for the trans community to gather and support each other.

* Consider His Perspective: Try to understand his desire to attend the event. Is he looking for a sense of belonging or to learn more about the trans experience?

* Safety Planning: If he does decide to attend, discuss safety measures with him. This could include going with a friend, letting you know his location, and having a plan in case of any uncomfortable situations.

Remember, every relationship is unique, and there is no one-size-fits-all answer. Be patient with yourself and your husband, and be willing to work together to find a way to navigate this aspect of your relationship that works for both of you.

Disclaimer: It's important to note that attending events specifically for the trans community while cross-dressing can be a complex issue. Some members of the trans community may have concerns about cisgender individuals attending their events, especially if they are not fully aware of the nuances of the trans experience. Open and honest communication with your husband about these potential concerns is crucial.

Another Q from a wife my husband wants to go out crossdressed.. this is like a bucket list thing and sometimes we get bored dressing home alone and stepping out even in the back garden late as night can be thrilling..

This is for informational purposes only. For medical advice or diagnosis, consult a professional.

It's understandable to have mixed feelings if your husband wants to venture out cross-dressed. Here's a breakdown of things to consider:

* Communication is Key: The most important thing is open and honest communication with your husband. Discuss his motivations for wanting to venture out. Is he seeking social interaction, a sense of community, or a different kind of experience?

* Address Your Concerns: If you have concerns about his safety, potential social stigma, or how it might impact your relationship, express them calmly and respectfully.

* Safety Planning: If he does decide to venture out, discuss safety measures with him. This could include choosing safe locations, going with a friend, and having a plan in case of any uncomfortable situations.

* Respect His Decision: Ultimately, the decision of whether or not to venture out cross-dressed is his. Respect his autonomy and support him in his decision, even if you have reservations.

* Seek Support: If you're struggling to cope with these feelings or if you have concerns about your relationship, consider seeking support from a therapist or counselor. They can provide a safe space to explore your emotions and offer guidance on navigating this aspect of your relationship.

Remember, every relationship is unique, and there is no one-size-fits-all answer. Be patient with yourself and your husband, and be willing to work together to find a way to navigate this aspect of your relationship that works for both of you.

I asked as a wife again my CD hubby chats to other Crossdressers on line and again another good response from Gemini

This is for informational purposes only. For medical advice or diagnosis, consult a professional.

It's understandable to have questions and concerns if you discover your husband is chatting online with other crossdressers. Here's a breakdown of things to consider:

* Communication is Key: The most important thing is open and honest communication with your husband. Ask him about his motivations for connecting with other crossdressers online. Is it for support, friendship, advice, or other reasons?

* Understand His Needs: Try to understand what he's seeking from these online interactions. Does he feel a sense of community or belonging? Does it help him feel more comfortable with his identity?

* Address Your Concerns: If you have concerns about the nature of these online interactions, express them calmly and respectfully. Explain your feelings and ask for reassurance about the boundaries he's setting.

* Set Boundaries Together: If you have concerns about potential risks, such as emotional or sexual involvement with others online, discuss setting clear boundaries together.

* Seek Support: If you're struggling to cope with these feelings or if you have concerns about your relationship, consider seeking support from a therapist or counselor. They can provide a safe space to explore your emotions and offer guidance on navigating this aspect of your relationship.

Remember, every relationship is unique, and there is no one-size-fits-all answer. Be patient with yourself and your husband, and be willing to work together to find a way to navigate this aspect of your relationship that works for both of you.

Again for a wife I asked I don't fancy my husband when he's presenting as a woman..

It's understandable to feel differently attracted to your husband when he cross-dresses. Here are some things to consider:

* Communication is Key: Talk openly and honestly with your husband about your feelings. Explain that you're not attracted to him when he cross-dresses, but emphasize that this doesn't change your love and respect for him.

* Respect his Expression: While you may not be attracted to him in that way, it's important to respect his right to express himself authentically.

* Explore Other Avenues: Consider alternative ways to connect with him sexually and emotionally, such as cuddling, massage, or other forms of intimacy.

* Seek Support: If you're struggling with these feelings, consider seeking support from a therapist or counselor. They can provide a safe space to explore your emotions and offer guidance on navigating this aspect of your relationship.

Remember, every relationship is unique, and there is no one-size-fits-all solution. Be patient with yourself and your husband, and be willing to work together to find a way to navigate this aspect of your relationship that works for both of you.

Does crossdressing progress to anything else?

Some people who cross-dress may find that their expression evolves over time. This could include:

* Increased comfort and confidence: As individuals become more comfortable with cross-dressing, they may explore different styles, experiment with makeup and hair, and feel more confident in their presentation.

* Shifting motivations: The reasons for cross-dressing may evolve over time. For example, someone may initially cross-dress for personal enjoyment and later discover that it helps them explore aspects of their gender identity.

* Changing presentation: The way someone cross-dresses may change over time. They may experiment with different styles, find what makes them feel most comfortable and confident, and refine their look.

It's important to remember that everyone's experience with cross-dressing is unique, and there is no single "progression" that applies to everyone.

Flipping this what disadvantages are there? Noting this I think are the things our wWves and GFs maybe find hard to express to us about our dressing and the effects on them?

Some potential disadvantages of having a cross-dressing husband include:

* Challenges to Traditional Gender Roles: Cross-dressing can challenge traditional gender roles and societal expectations, which may cause discomfort or conflict for some partners.

* Social Stigma: Depending on the social environment, there may be social stigma associated with cross-dressing, which can impact the couple's social life and relationships with others.

* Jealousy or Insecurity: Some partners may experience feelings of jealousy or insecurity if they feel threatened by their husband's cross-dressing or fear it could impact their relationship.

* Communication Challenges: Openly discussing cross-dressing and navigating differing perspectives can be challenging and may require ongoing communication and compromise.

* Potential for Relationship Strain: If not addressed openly and respectfully, a husband's cross-dressing can create strain within the relationship if it's not understood or accepted by the partner.

It's important to remember that these are potential challenges, and not all couples will experience them. Open communication, mutual respect, and a willingness to understand each other's perspectives are key to navigating these potential challenges successfully.