Boredom, Stress, and the Call of Davina

There’s something that’s been nagging at me lately. I hope I'm not boring you dear reader banging on with the woe is me I haven't got the opportunity to dress!!

Blogs are replacing the dressing and getting the angst off my chest no doubt many of you go through when in the same place as me.

A quiet little thought sometimes drifts in at the end of the day, after work is done, after dinner is eaten, when the house is still and the TV’s on in the background. Especially when there's no sport on and her indoors is watching some "Reality TV" - OMG how I hate reality TV some z list celeb and cameras following them around their mundane lives trying to make it look exciting and also needing counselling for being a z lister blurghhh.

It’s not always about desire or stress. Sometimes… it’s just boredom.

I find myself sat next to my wife, watching something she's picked that I'm not particularly interested in. She's enjoying it, and I'm glad she is—but I'm just sitting there, twiddling my thumbs, brain quietly ticking over. And then the thought comes in:

“I could be upstairs right now… slipping into a dress, putting on makeup, escaping into Davina for an hour or two.”

Only I can’t. The kids are home. They're always home these days. I’m out to my wife, but not to them—and so dressing is off the table. That quiet sense of possibility is shut down, and I’m left with nothing to do but sit and not be bored as male me as the program drones on and oh no it's a series and there are more episodes.....

Is It Just Boredom? Or Something Deeper?

This was a new thought for me. I’ve always known Davina comes out when I’m stressed, or when I need relief from male me. My reset button. But lately, I’ve started wondering—does she also emerge when I’m simply bored as a man?

When there’s nothing else going on, and I feel disconnected from the world, becoming Davina offers an activity, a sense of purpose, even excitement.

Dressing takes focus. It takes time. It’s sensual and creative and rewarding.

Compared to that, scrolling the telly or doom-scrolling on my phone feels utterly flat.

So maybe Davina doesn’t just help me cope with pressure. Maybe she also fills the empty spaces. The in-between times. The “what now?” moments.

Am I Escaping Boredom—Or Escaping Myself?

It’s worth asking:

• is this healthy?

• Is crossdressing becoming a way to avoid dealing with boredom?

• Should I be finding a new hobby?

• Taking up guitar or go out jogging (my poor knees)

• or fixing that door that’s been wonky for months?

  
  

Maybe. But maybe what I’m bored of… is only ever being him - When I crossdress I forget male things and just for want of a better word "Chill".

The Frustration of In-Between

When you're out to your wife but not your kids—and the house is always full—you live in a strange sort of in-between. You’ve taken a brave step by being honest. You’ve opened the door. But you still can’t walk through it. Even worse if coms fails between you and your wife and you need to talk about this but you feel you can't or get the vibes from your wife she doesn't want to talk "Davina"

It’s like Davina lives just one flight of stairs away (in a bag), but she’s still out of reach.

I know I could be up here, relaxing, enjoying putting on makeup, pulling up hosiery and stepping into high heels. But I’m not. I can’t. So I sit, feeling the tension between what I want to do and what I’m allowed to do. - The kids have everything we do everything for them anything they want to do - WE just ask for a little help around the house and when they rebel on that we tell them what we give up for them.. how we work.. how we have bills and real stress - But i can't tell them i give up Crossdressing for them also.

And when I can’t dress, that desire doesn’t disappear. It just sits in the background, humming quietly like an appliance left on standby. I try to distract myself. But it’s there. Waiting.

Final Thought: Maybe It’s Not Boredom After All

Maybe boredom is just the cover story. Maybe it’s what happens when part of you wants to be available, but can’t be. When Davina is ready to emerge—but life won’t allow it.

Or maybe it really is boredom. And maybe I do need another hobby.

Currently up and out in the mornings walking 3-4 miles maybe now it's summer I'll do an evening walk also and maybe my wife will join me on a walk and maybe we'll get that chat about all this..

Davina