New podcast on the weekly hot spot out - “The Fear of Being Found Out – Keeping Your Kink Private”

I’ve just finished listening to The Weekly Hotspot episode “The Fear of Being Found Out – Keeping Your Kink Private,” and it landed so close to home in lots of parts Erika and Olivia dive into the anxiety, secrecy, thrill, and vulnerability that comes with hiding a kink—especially one tied to identity and sexuality.

For anyone who grew up crossdressing in private, the episode feels painfully accurate.

And for me? It was like hearing some of my own filthy teenage years narrated back to me.

When I was younger, my crossdressing was a completely hidden world.

I borrowed lingerie - ANYONES I came across I was so bad...

On a few occassions I washed, dried, and carefully returned items to where they belonged.

And I did it all while terrified of being discovered being as meticulous as possible not to leave a clue that someone had "borrowed" stockings, lingerie or high heels.

Back then, crossdressing wasn’t what Davina is to me now—it wasn’t emotional, grounding, or connected to identity. It was purely sexual. My first erection, my first orgasm… both happened while crossdressed. For the alpha sporty kid I was, being found out would’ve been catastrophic. No one would have connected “him” with a boy secretly pulling on stockings and getting off in lingerie - The captain of the rugby, football and cricket team that kid always running up and down mountains fit as a fiddle Sport was life.

The podcast talks about this duality—the desire and the dread, the euphoria and the shame. I felt all of that. After cumming, I’d suddenly crash into fear, shame and guilt, convinced the universe had marked me for exposure.

All Crossdressers will tell you with orgasm dressed up comes shame and the need to undress and return to male things even being hard on yourself calling yourself a looser from dressing up.. until next time.

Yet at the same time, there was an undeniable thrill in almost being caught a few times also.

“Are you wearing mascara?” My heart nearly stopped and more than once I've had someone ask me that when I've not taken the time to remove it properly.

That blend of arousal, panic, shame, and excitement is something almost every t-girl will quietly admit to. And this episode captured it perfectly.

The Vulnerability of the Hidden Self

The podcast explorers the psychological weight of secrecy: the sense that you’re living two lives, that discovery could collapse everything. Even now, as an adult, I recognise that same fear. I’m an “alpha” male on the surface—sporty, confident, masculine a leader in work.

The idea of someone outside my wife discovering Davina still brushes up against that old instinct to hide, to protect, to deny.

Erika and Olivia discuss how keeping a kink private becomes a lifestyle. You learn to be covert. You rehearse excuses. You become a secret agent—cleaning up evidence, planning exits, managing people’s perceptions. I lived that for years.

And honestly?

I got very good at it.

Monty Python sketch "No one expects the Spanish Enquisition!!"" that's me such is the front of my macho male self no one would believe me if i told them about being Davina..

The Turning Point for me - Coming Out to My Wife

Here’s where my story diverges from the teenage secrecy. I’m out to my wife—properly out, fully known, fully understood. Well, eventually understood.

The way it happened still amuses me. She asked if she could dress me as a woman. For a laugh, I thought she’d discovered everything and was calling me out. But no—she just wanted to see whether her “alpha maniac” husband would actually let her put him in makeup and a dress.

It raised an interesting “what if,” which this podcast made me revisit:

What if I’d pretended it was my first time?

What if I’d acted like she’d created my crossdresser side instead of revealing what already existed?

Would she have felt responsible for “making me” this way?

Would she have embraced Davina more quickly?

Would our life be different?

Would she be pegging me? lol... Ahem moving on..

But I didn’t choose that path. I chose the truth. I told her everything.

And it took years—years—for her to accept it. But she eventually did.

And now she’s amazing with Davina.

This episode reminded me how fragile that process was. One wrong move, one careless reveal, one slip could’ve derailed everything.

The Reality: We Still Walk on Eggshells

Even now, being found out by others isn’t something I want and my wife certainly doesn't want me to come out to the world as the world doesn’t always understand. Partners sometimes struggle, families can react badly, social circles can implode. So the episode’s theme of maintaining privacy—choosing when to show your kink and when to protect it—still rings true.

When you don’t want to be discovered, you learn to be subtle.

You have your explanations ready.

You have your escape route.

And you never underestimate how exposed crossdressing can make you feel.

The podcast perfectly captured that psychology:

that mixture of self-protection, self-expression, denial, longing, shame, and thrill.

https://www.spreaker.com/episode/sissy-secrets-the-fear-of-being-found-out-keeping-your-kink-private--68721617

Final Thoughts

The Weekly Hotspot didn’t just talk about kink—it talked about being human, about the private selves we protect and the fear of those selves being dragged into the light. For me, it resurfaced memories of secret dressing, forbidden lingerie, close calls, messy clean-ups, and the long, slow path from fear to honesty with the one person who matters most.

It reminded me why Davina still exists partly in the shadows—and why that shadow once felt both terrifying and intoxicating.

A brilliant episode, and for anyone who’s ever hidden a kink or a part of themselves, it’s well worth a listen.

Davina