Seasonal dressing

Aren't you lucky a 3rd blog so quickly explodes from my finger tips..

Seasons, Style and the Difference Between “Getting Dressed” and Feeling Feminine

A parcel arrived from SHEIN for my wife this week. A few different outfits, casual summer things, everyday wear.

At one point she tried on a pair of light brown cropped trousers with a striped blouse and asked: “What do you think?”

And my honest reaction was: “Yeah, that looks nice.”

But the deeper thought in my head was: Women can wear absolutely anything they want there’s no dresses in that order.

She looked good. But it struck me how different her relationship with clothes is compared to mine when I think about Davina.

As a man, I have seasonal wardrobes too.

Long sleeve shirts and jumpers in winter, short sleeve shirts and lighter clothes in summer.

Practical changes. Most men do. We rotate clothing around weather and comfort.

But if Davina had a similar sized parcel arrive from SHEIN, it would tell a completely different story.

There would be dresses. Skater, Floral, Plain, V-necks, above-the-knee styles.

There would be hosiery, lingerie, heels rather than flat flip flops, and outfits chosen not simply because they are comfortable or practical, but because they feel feminine.

That’s the difference I notice.

My wife can wear whatever works for the day. Davina would wear what creates a feeling.

If I imagine myself as a woman, I know exactly the type of woman I would be stylistically.

Summer would mean smooth tanned legs, dresses, lighter fabrics, bare legs in the sun and feeling visibly feminine.

Autumn and winter would become black tights season, the look I absolutely love.

Dresses with black opaque tights, heeled boots, coats, layered fashion, softer colours and textures.

And interestingly, I wouldn’t necessarily pack away all the summer dresses when the seasons changed. Some of those brighter summer colours would stay in rotation, just adapted for colder weather with tights and boots.

The same dress can feel completely different depending on styling.

That’s probably why the attic became unexpectedly emotional this weekend.

My wife wanted her vacuum-packed summer dresses brought down so she could sort through them, pick outfits for summer and decide what she no longer wanted.

Three storage bags full of dresses. Some I’ve worn myself over the years. Some that remind me of different moments, holidays, summers and versions of femininity.

I joked with her: “If you throw anything out, it’ll end up in Davina’s wardrobe.”

But there was truth in it.

Not because I simply want more clothes, but because I appreciate them differently and we’ve paid for them so we can’t just give them to charity.

I notice cuts, fabrics, lengths, necklines, the way a dress works with tights, the shape heels create, how hosiery changes an outfit entirely.

Maybe I should be more Devil Wears Prada and be some sort of female fashion consultant or fashion writer but none of that fits with my life course and alphaness. I went to the cinema with the family not many men there watching the Devil Wears Prada 2 but wow how stunning is Anne Hathaway wow ...

Clothing feels expressive to me, not merely functional. Even as a man I’ll dress a part, I want to look fashionable.. Even in joggers and T-shirt with my DH Gate fake Nike.

And perhaps that’s the biggest difference of all.

For many women, clothing is normality. Everyday life. Throwing something on for work, shopping or the weather.

For Davina, femininity feels intentional. Constructed carefully. Savoured.

The makeup would always matter. The outfit would always matter. The legs would always matter.

Not because femininity has to look like that, but because that’s the version of femininity I connect to most strongly .. Elegant, styled, seasonal and expressive.

Maybe that’s why black tights season never really leaves my mind, even in summer.

It's been far too hot this week for makeup and tights..

Davina