The Frustration of a Completer-Finisher without completion

There’s a unique kind of stress that comes from being someone who's driven to get things done to improve things.. it can create self stress.

You see the loose ends, the details that need tidying, the projects that would move faster if only everyone else thought and processed like you.

You’re wired to push things over the finish line, to see tasks through properly. And yet, more often than not, progress gets stuck in the mud of delays, other people’s priorities, or sheer lack of urgency.

The result? You carry it. You push harder.

You create your own stress because unfinished work gnaws at you. Add the everyday chaos of life—family commitments, unpredictable changes, pressures from all directions—and suddenly you’re wound tight, with no clear release.

For me, crossdressing has always been that release. A way to step out of the stress loop and into a different space, a different version of myself.

It’s not just about clothes—it’s about freedom and escapism.

For a little while, I can drop the weight of being the one who always finishes, always pushes, always drives.

But here’s the catch: even the escape has its barriers. My wife knows, but my kids don’t.

They’re always around, coming and going, lectures cancelled, plans changing at the last minute.

Privacy is rare, sometimes impossible back to hardly any hope of finding quality time to become "Davina"

So what should be my pressure valve often feels locked away. And that creates a second layer of frustration: the escape is right there, but I can’t get to it.

It’s a strange tension—between the part of me that wants everything completed, ordered, finished, and the part of me that longs for space to simply be. Both pull at me constantly.

So, where does that leave me?

Learning to live in the in-between. Finding micro-escapes. Accepting that not everything can be finished. And holding onto the hope of those rare moments when the world finally steps aside and I get to exhale—fully, completely, to my escape.

It's not been a bad year for Crossdressing but the summer was a no go and only once since.

Davina