By: Katie
Subject: CD Style(s) and shopping.
I'm always confused about the public's perception of how crossdressers dress and how we actually dress.
I think that the public think that we all want to dress as hookers or drag queens but in reality I think that it is a lot different for the majority. I know that personally I like to dress in what I'd call TV presenter chic. Smartly dressed women, normally in heel, dresses or skirts. Immaculate hair and make up.
Looking at 'specialist' crossdressing sites the clothes do seem to mirror the public's perception so I wonder if they are doing us a disservice or just selling to a minority. The prices also look high and the quality low.
Personally I wouldn't buy from a 'specialist' shop unless I knew I had total anonymity. I can think of nothing worse than a courier delivering a box with 'Crossdresser R Us' all over it lol. Maybe it's paranoia but I'd also be worried about being open to blackmail.
As a result I do most of my shopping on-line with a click and collect service from the major Women' fashion retailers . I'm in control. Boobs and wigs have also been bought from unisex sites after much research.
I've often wondered if there was a market for a discreet service where crossdressers can buy main stream fashion at reasonable prices. I know quite a few of our American cousins often use thrift store (Charity shops to us in the UK). My wife quiet often comes back with a 'label' Charity shop bargain after she's dropped something off. Would you buy 'pre-loved' clothes and shoes on-line? Reading Carly's post I guess there is a market lol.
Going back to a TV theme I have a fantasy about dressing as one of the Strictly women contestants. Problem is I'd probably end up more as Ed Balls than Louise lol.
By: Davina
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: CD Style(s) and shopping.
Here's Query and something I don't understand
If I went to Cardiff for a night out as Davina ... By the way never gonna happen but do I really risk being beat up and potentially being killed for presenting as a woman?
Whats all that about?
By: Katie
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: CD Style(s) and shopping.
Yes aiming for acceptance and not understanding is a good line.
Tabloid TV is never going to be interested in plain old vanilla crossdressers. As Davina says we just want to dress as we like to see women dressed. I'm sure when a bloke put on a football shirt he has a deep down desire to play for his team but it's just a fantasy and will probably never happen.
Part of the reason for blending is that you don't want to draw unwanted attention. If you do then you and everyone else knows how to dress! A man in a dress is probably at a higher risk of death or injury than anyone else so not drawing attention is partly for protection.
Another reason for not venturing out alone at night!
By: Sindy
Subject: Re: Re: Re: CD Style(s) and shopping.
I like that - aiming for acceptance, not understanding. I think that's realistic and fair. People won't always understand it, as most crossdressers don't, but they can learn to accept that some men are wired this way.
I wonder if this will ever happen..
By: Davina
Subject: Re: Re: CD Style(s) and shopping.
If we ever went out dressed the aim would be to blend in and look as convincing as possible so not to draw attention and also not to attract straight men or admirers in the same way women probably don't want that sort of attention.
There have been a number of TV programs covering Transvestites and sometimes crossdressers going to clubs on the trans scene but they usually always make them seem wacky and eccentric.
I've thought loads of times how would a TV show present me to the public.
Here's a guy he's normal well actually he's above average lol hard working in a stressful job but well educated, with a life plan to get married settle down have two kids a nice house and he's very sporty loves to play and watch sport he's very competitive and quite sure of himself the program would follow me leading men in work and show my family life etc then cut to but once a month for a bit of r&r if the time is available and the urge appears he becomes Davina totally transforms his male appearance to a female one for a few hours camera pans on the transformation to me fully cross dressed going about normal things at home but dressed as a woman going On to try to explain that there is no way to explain exactly why I cross dress but you've seen I'm a normal bloke so its easier to just accept than understand it... It's just something some men do
But how boring is that its far easier to show trans people as eccentric and wacky.
If I was out the aim would definitely be to pass and not be pointed as as a crossdresser but as I'm not out in public its not likely to happen.
By: Sindy
Subject: Re: CD Style(s) and shopping.
Personally I think the general public doesn't understand cross dressing AT ALL (I don't really either come to think of it lol) so they're assuming all sorts of things (gay, drag queen, insane) but not that you're actually blending in with women. If they saw you doing that, they'd then assume you're a transwoman. Truly, you can't win. Not unless there's some broad range education throughout schools or something and I can't see that ever happening - 'welcome students to our new Alternative Lifestyle and Male Fetishes class'. Nah, it won't happen lol.
I do wonder what the goal for average crossdressers is though. You identify as men yet try very hard to blend as women. Do you want the general public to understand this or do you want them not to notice you at all? Given you do dress up more than most women, I sense you'll always be more noticeable, especially to other men. You dress the way men like women to dress. If crossdressers ever did become more public and accepted I have a feeling you would eventually knock heads with other straight men who would tire very quickly of hitting on you all! It could literally become dangerous to blend in, so maybe the only hope for crossdressers with regard to public acceptance is to be seen as crossdressers and not as women. I'm guessing this would bother you all though?
Wow, there really is no winning is there lol. Like I've said before, I'm glad I'm not the crossdresser. Life sure is simpler without all the gender complications.
By: Davina
Subject: Re: Re: Re: CD Style(s) and shopping.
Muggles yes very good and I suppose a fully fledged member of the Tranny hierarchy is a wizard and us Crossdressers are Squibs in the eyes of the magical world lol
I dress how I'd like to see women dress
By: Katie
Subject: Re: Re: CD Style(s) and shopping.
Yes, Daisy was the model with the fabulously long legs!
I'm just basing my thoughts on the pictures posted by members of the forum I use. The majority just want to look 'normal' in the sense of being smartly dressed women. There are a few 'specialist' looks but vast majority seem to fit the 'Davina' look which may surprise a lot of the general public or 'muggles' as I once heard them referred too lol.
I guess the look we want to achieve is specialist in a way that it is not the way women would dress on a day to day basis unless of course work required it (TV presenter).
By: Davina
Subject: Re: CD Style(s) and shopping.
Was Daisy the model? She has fab long legs (Not that I watch Strictly but it's always on in the background as I'm plugged into my laptop watching Saturday night football)
You are 100% correct the publics perception of how crossdressers dress and how we actually dress is worlds apart but then again so is the trans spectrum as some Crossdressers do dress as the public perceives.
I'm more likely to be in nice lingerie, fake boobs granted but with usually black tights or stockings (Mostly) and high heels with a nice dress nothing tarty just nice casual. In my collection which I need to thin down I have all types of dresses from every day to Party dresses all of which the wifes thrown out and if we had a sort out no doubt she'd claim half of them back.
Like Katie I go for the immaculate look trying to look as convincing as possible I defiantly don't go for the overstated drag queen look but again some tgirls do and this is the type of perception I believe my wife had that fateful day when she came home in her lunch hour knowing I was crossdressed working from home in our bedroom and up she came with a cup of tea.. I could see the surprise on her face and realisation of oh he doesn't look like a hooker or drag queen he's actually good at makeup and looks like .... a woman gasp. lol
Specialist Crossdressing sites are a rip off get down to Primark far cheaper and good enough for Crossdressing.
This time of year people will assume you're buying the wife Christmas presents and stocking fillers...It's fun lol
And if someone asks if the items are for you say yes they probably wont believe you anyway lol