Hi all, Sarah here. Like many I started trying on my mothers and later sisters (she's 6 years younger) things and finding it both a release and exciting. At 16 and a half I joined the RAF and despite participating in "manly" things like hard drinking, chasing women (unsuccessfully) and other things men were expected to do. I secret I would dress, experiment and often drive several miles to different towns to buy clothing so I would not be seen by anyone. I always felt I was more attracted to the feminine form than women themselves, but never felt any attraction to men. I also never considered it anything other than a strange perversion/kink/twist and not something I could share. Then I met a fantastic girl, fell in love and swore my crossdressing days were behind me. When we were courting (a lovely old fashioned word) I tried to explore he feeling son crossdressing, but she was repelled by men who did that and said we would be finished if I did it! Like many I purged (again) and threw out everything, convinced I was never going to dress again, after all I was in a new house, married and getting used to married life!

But as many will testify, the old urge came back, and for years I dressed in secret, when the wife (and then kids) were not around but also when away on business or courses in hotels. Over the years I managed to perfect the art of hiding stuff away in the loft and getting it out for trips so I could be Sarah for a few hours at a time. In the early days I met other crossdressers for meals and even a boat trip on a river with about 20 others, a memorable day! Lately the chance to meet has been few and far between, mostly when on business trips or when taking my daughter back to uni and staying over night in a hotel. The recent pandemic meant I had to work from home as the office and client visits were stopped, meaning dressing was next to impossible and the stresses of daily life were having a huge impact on me. Fortunately my wife has learnt to listen to my rants and raves and smile and nod and then when I have blown off steam give a few words of insight and support. To be frank, without her understanding and compassion I would have been far worse off during the pandemic than I am. As it is I am working through some work related stress issues and I am lucky in that my line managers recognise that and are supporting me.

However things changed dramatically a short while ago. I had ordered some underwear and had it delivered to a local shop for collection. When home I put it in the back of my wardrobe, hidden behind some clothes until I could try it on for size and fit. I was aware my wife had disturbed it but not that she had seen it, then one night when we were in bed she asked me the question, "Who's underwear is in your wardrobe"? She instantly thought I was having an affair, and it took a lot of convincing to persuade her otherwise! I confessed, knowing that 20 plus years of marriage were about to end, I would be looking for somewhere to live and quite possibly alienated from my children, To my surprise she did not explode or throw me out, we talked until 4 in the morning, and she agreed to try and understand, and we are now working out ways to compromise. As it says in the Bible, love endures all.