So your man is a crossdresser.

You've either found out by accident or he's confessed he's a crossdresser.

What's immediately going through your mind?

My wife's immediate we're

• Are you Gay?

• Do you do that to attract men?

• Do you want to be a woman?

• Do you want a sex change?

• Is this my fault?

For the vast majority of us it's NO! To all the above but those are the questions that almost always come from wives and girlfriends immediately after finding out or being told.. oh and sometimes "Are you having an affair who's clothes are these in our house?"

So with No to all the above you're now saddled in a relationship with a crossdressing husband or boyfriend what next? What's the fears?

Fear 1 he's lied about the above? He says he's not gay but is he bisexual?

Probably the same NO!

Fear 2 what does this mean for pur marriage / relationship?

Well it doesn't mean the end. Talk and find out why he dresses as a woman as there are many reasons and the majority of the reasons non sexual which most don't realise as simple as liking the feel of the fabric, the pure escapism from male life for a bit, an enjoyment in dressing up like a woman, wearing things we appreciate on women etc.. lots of reasons all explored in this Forum.

Can there be a compromise?

• I never want to see you dressed

• I never want to see evidence youve been dressed

• Do it when I'm not home

• Don't wear my things buy your own

Etc etc

My wife's compromise started as the above to her one day via curiosity coming home from work knowing I was working on my laptop upstairs dressed meeting "Davina" face to face for the first time and that moved us on but took years for her to do that with negotiated conditions over those years.

So what's the fears ladies?

My wife has 2 although says she just has one and the one has sub categories.

Her main fear is

• I'd present as Davina a lot more or even full time with the sub categories being a fear I'd go out more as Davina in public and people would find out I was Trans behind the veneer of Alpha male I project onto the world. So two fold one that maybe she'd lose male me to Davina entirely married to a man presenting female and where that may then evolve further and secondly other people knowing and how that may affect us both in the community, in work and in family life as she asked me "How do you think your Father would react if he knew you were a crossdresser?"

• The second she says isn't a worry but I guess this is there for all wives and GFs and that's sexuality.. When you're crossdressed does it affect your sexuality? Gay / Bisexual etc. And it can for some and some t-girls can question themselves on their sexuality and how we may feel when en fem so both are valid fears.

So I'm interested in knowing from the wives and girlfriends here does the above ring true for you? Or do you have any other fears?

Same goes to the T-girls who may have chatted to your Wives and GFs on here have your wives like mine confided their fears in you being on this trans spectrum and if so what have they said to you?

Davina