"You take the blue pill, the story ends. You wake up in your bed and believe whatever you want to believe. You take the red pill, you stay in Wonderland, and I show you how deep the rabbit hole goes."

As I posted in an earlier thread, what if artificially increasing testosterone levels could actually 'cure' the need to crossdress. Besides the unknown side effects I wouldn't have this urge any longer and could lead a 'normal' life making everything so much simpler.

Suddenly I gave this a lot more thought. I've been dressing in varying degrees on and off for over 40 years. It's part of who I am and if I changed that would it change me as a person? Could I risk becoming one of those men I despise because my T levels escalated? Despite everything I do enjoy crossdressing and the benefits it brings. What if I still had these stresses but no release valve?

For the first time I think that the answer would be no. It made me feel sad and even scared that I'd no longer feel the way I do when I'm dressed. I'd miss it even though I no longer had the desire. I'd want to take the red pill stay in 'Wonderland' a little while longer. After all that's who I am.

I know that the majority of wives and partners would want us to take the blue pill but what would you do faced with the dilemma? Would any wives or partners prefer we took the red pill, stayed in Wonderand and explored the rabbit hole together?