By: Davina
Subject: Bringing a reply back to the top as it would be waaaay down the pafe
This is the “Support forum” for newly informed wives of crossdressers to chat to guys like us.
I would be over the moon if I could make a wife or girlfriend feel better about crossdressing in minutes or at least allay lots of fears.
Agree the internet is a blessing and a curse… I’ve seen some really bad advice on the internet some from so called psychiatrists or councillors..
There will always be a story from a wife where they haven’t been married to our type of Crossdresser shock and awe and sexuality driven.. etc.. and also the extreme Trannys who are bitter and obsessive.
Neither have a healthy perspective on crossdressing… I hope we are bringing balance to the force and peace in the Galaxy here “Jedi Crossdresser Masters”.
We do internalize things less and look for the benefits and we are probably less worried about our social image than women.. Although I like that I have a clean common sense Alpha Male image.. I’m 40 and don’t care what people think of me but do like being respected as a man (little do they know my escapism technique lol).. I was 30 like 2 mins ago and 19 5 mins ago.. I also looked much better Crossdressed 20 years ago but lost the photos to prove it.
Luckily I look no where near 40 and becoming Davina makes me look younger or my mirror is one of those joke ones from the fairground.
My kids have no idea and neither of us want to confuse them with my crossdressing (full stop).
Interesting to read a that a couple of your friends know your husband crossdresses (in confidence but have they talked amongst themselves and with their other halves? Does that worry you? Does he know you’ve told them)
How did you go about telling your friends and how did they react?
My wife says she hasn’t told anyone … I wouldn’t care if she has …. I’d want to know if she has told someone… I’d probably say certain sarcastic things tho to see if I could get a reaction lol..
I’m glad you realise Crossdressing is a “natural urge” but I think You’re thinking too much again as yes we made the decision to be fathers (We’re Alpha males after all with life plans) and that does come first obviously but our crossdressing came long long long long before our relationship and marriage and kids but I for one have never considered my Crossdressing would have, has had or will have any effect on a relationship, marriage or being a father.. maybe naive, maybe I don’t think it’s that big a deal that I crossdress as why should it have an effect as it’s private, now shared with my wife, its very occasional, I’m still the same person I just happen to look fabulous as a leggy blonde and have mastered makeup and can easily walk in 5 inch heels albeit on carpet.. never tried concrete..
He didn’t want the ample opportunity NOT to marry and have kids.. Crossdressing is far less important than this part of our lives He did have to do the family thing as that’s what he wanted in his Alpha Male life plan with you and for all of us the family comes first.. Crossdressing is a natural urge and it’s harmless.
I’m sure there is sacrifice on both sides of the Parent / Husband / Wife duties there are lots of things we’d like to do but put the kids first like having a night out just husband and wife but always hard to gain a babysitter, play sport, have a weekend away together, and lots of other things but we decided to have kids and our independence wont stop when they grow up and leave home as they will always need our support then eventually we become grand parents and baby sit for them (This life plan business).
Have you asked your husband if he can take his crossdressing out of the house?
Would you be happy him booking for and paying for a hotel being crossdressed in a hotel room or local crossdressing group (which I’m told exist) just to keep it all very covert for a decade or two?
20 years of wondering what he’s upto when crossdressed in a hotel or this tranny talking group?
Would you be OK if this was possible?
I’m sure my wife wouldn’t want this..
I have talked to my her about dressing and how it will be harder as the kids come and go when they like and have a house key as one is about to do in the next year or so going into last year of junior school then up the comp… My answer is I sometimes pack Davina when away with work and dress in the hotel works paid for… I am away often enough maybe for this to work for me but does your husband have this opportunity? And can you / he justify the hotel spend just to crossdress?
I can add a new page 'Ask a crossdresser a question' or just change the name of the guestbook / chat page as that’s what its turning into lol. And I’m enjoying it too..
Lots have found the Blog via internet searches.. If I took the domain “why do men crossdress” I’d get more hits .. not sure if it costs money or not to get the domain name will look into it.
By: Davina
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Bringing a reply back to the top as it would be waaaay down the pafe
A lot of information on line is often very serious and tangled up in transgender speak which worries women straight away and yes lots of support sites suggest crossdressing is progressive and thats right but its the way they go about worrying women in what they write when what it should say is talk .. dont get advice from a faceless website chat and communicate find the truth together.
Lots of forums do frighten with words such as transition as lots of people don’t get the part time occasional crossdresser, dressing for the fun of it.. “there must be more to it than that!”.. “not a lot more actually no”
To convey that a woman would be delusional to think any cross dresser wouldn't eventually transition or become gay and that women are fools for staying married is very wrong and probably comes from a woman who this has happened to which I think is very rare.. She’s obviously unaware that Jedi CrossdressMasters exist lol.
I’m glad to read Sindy saying this is a “Fun, informative support place” as for me its Mission Accomplished as thats what I want the blog to be.
I think I will look up on line other wives who have told friends and how they reacted and might blog about it.. Is it a good idea or not? Others won’t get it but may tell others even if its “a frends of mine tod me her husband crossdresses...” Some like my wife would say each to their own as long as my husband does it… oops. Must be cool to know you have a shoulder to cry on if you need to.
I know why you needed it .. You needed to get it off your chest and that understandable which is why I would understand if my wife has or wanted to talk to someone about my crossdressing.
I’m sure if people found it it would be easy for me to deny or i’d used the old Jedi Crossdress Master mind trick and erase their memory… I’ve also wateched Harry Potter enough to know the magic word to erase memories is “Obliviate”
Your husband has an inkling? He doesnt know? I’d want to know if my wife had told someone and what she’s told them and how they reacted and what they said or advised her.
I dont think my wife would be ok with me booking a hotel just for me to go and dress, luckily I get away with work and they pay for the hotel and I pack “Davina” lol I worked from home today and got dolled up which was nice but opportunity as the kids get older may be reduced to when I work away and stay in a hotel.
Collecting cards or model trains or something? That’s not sexy!! Lingerie is lol you cant get the weird stress release from collecting stamps.
Sindys house is a kinky nightmare lets all visit lol.. and yes watch your lingerie boys get upto all sorts lol..
The same as Katie I have a tracker on the kids phones as the oldest wants to go out alone this summer so got a phone put a tracker on it but I’d only dress at home with knowledge that theres no way anyone would find me dressed. So I know when it's safe to dress. Kids are at school or with baby sitters and if they're ill the school phones. My wife is at work but ok seeing me dressed when she comes home for lunch and provided we're not expecting a delivery I know I've got a window of a few hours too.
I always sleep as my male self if I dress when away with work too. Make sure no signs of makeup before I hit off the lights to sleep.. Then make sure again in the morning no sign of makeup before I go into work.
I feel the same Katie as I can only dress for so long before I get bored - all dressed up an nowhere to go! And once I’ve dressed it can be days, weeks or months before I get the urge again to dress up.
I agree with Katie on the clip clop of heels and the sound of a zipper on a dress or skirt and that sound of nylon on nylon as a woman walks or crosses / uncrosses her legs.. No male equivalent.
Sindy thinks most of the things we like are positively dull … Women dont notice the things we feel they’re so lucky to have like stockings, lingerie, heels and other things like makeup and dresses which accentuate them which “does it” for us men and more so us crossdressers.
Wearing makeup isnt weird nor is making an effort to look nice £Especially for your husband” lol who’s mad us crossdressers or women? But remember we like visual things lol.
Yes I glam up as a guy but do this most days eg do my hair, dress nice, shave or have designed stubble and dress nice always trying to present myself to look nice as a bloke and more effort if im on a date with the wife oh and nice aftershave always have to smell nice.
I like to present well as a bloke and as a crossdresser you have to have a bit of pride in your appearance.. I hate that women once married and content cant be bothered to make the effort especially for their husbands as you dont know what a kick in the teeth this is for us.
Like Katie I keep my nails neat and tidy (they grow so fast my wife is jealous like my long eyelashes too) and I also use a male grooming set (sindy stop laughing) to make sure my eyebrows never get unruly and thick/ bushy along with no nose hair or hairs in my ears!
I have designer stubble more often than not these days as I think I look better with it and so does the wife.. and sometimes grow a man beard until it itches and I have to shave it back.
Agreed shaving body hair is to do with feeling clean.
No doubt there are more Sindy, Emma, Hannah and maybe my wife questions to raise from all this..