I'm sorry I haven't posted in a while. I have popped in now and again but it's just been time constraints. Good to see some new members and I hope to see Sindy back at some point! Davina has my email address so if you ever need it I'm happy that she gives it to you.
I joined Tvchix and have chatted to some really interesting people. I even managed to grab a coffee for a long chat with a transwoman. She really helped me to understand myself and where my crossdressing sits within my life.
On Tvchix you can classify yourself depending on how you identify. I changed mine from crossdresser to transgender. That doesn't mean to say that I want to become a woman it means that my dressing is a means of expressing part of me. The desires to feel and look feminine. I do not need or want this to be permanent, just sometimes I need to feel feminine, to express that part of my personality. Some women love to look and feel feminine, for others it's a pain in the ass and for me I just share that need to look feminine. We are all different, with different make ups and I don't like olives but some people love them does that make me wrong?
From talking with other t girls generally women are very accepting and supportive. My own experience with a personal shopper was really positive, it just seems to be wives and girlfriends who struggle with accepting that their husband wants to express a feminine side to their personality. I totally get this, I wouldn't want my wife to appear masculine, so I hide this part of myself away from her. It is difficult because she can never experience the whole me and I feel that I am holding back an important part of my life from her. It makes me sad but equally I must respect her feelings.
The whole gender expression is hard to get your head around. For me it is not about attracting 'men' which is a common misconception amongst people with little or no knowledge of crossdressers. I am sure that many women dress in a feminine way for themselves, to make them feel good. I'm sure you get mad when men think you just dress 'sexily' to attract them. I'm sure you put your glad rags on for a night out with the girls with no intention of getting a man!
Saying that, there are crossdressers who do dress to attract me. As Davina alluded to in a previous post crossdressing is a broad church. There are plenty of fetish dressers, sissies, schoolies and others who's motivation is sexual.
That's why I decided that I was transgender. Purely expressing a different gender to my normal appearance to satisfy a need within me. I can move up and down the gender spectrum to varying degrees. But overwhelmingly the effect on me is positive. I have taken to shaving my body hair (not that I have a lot anyway) but it make me feel better about myself. It is normally considered a 'feminine' pursuit and maybe it is but I like the look better than being hairy. It gives me more body confidence if that makes sense. Yes it's difficult to expose in public (I grew it back for holiday) but now I'm back I feel happier that it's gone.
I will post more later.
Katie x
Trans* is an all encompassing term that cover anyone who moves from one gender to another whether that is crossdressing or transitioning. The T in T girl is short for Trans. There are a whole multitude of terms and so it really how you feel you fit under the umbrella. I've always felt that 'Transvestite' has more of a sexual element to it (although other will disagree https://metro.co.uk/2018/01/31/what-is-transvestic-fetishism-we-investigate-the-fetish-for-dressing-in-the-opposite-genders-clothes-7247156/) but I don't always find it a turn on so trans gender appears to fit better. To me it is about the feelings of wellness and balance that I get being dressed. I get a buzz but not necessarily a sexual buzz. I think it's more of a dopamine hit.
For a trans women it is about matching her body to her mind. Her gender identity is 100% female and she considers herself to be a woman. This obviously cause big psychological problems if every time you look in a mirror you see a male reflection. I don't have that feeling so don't consider myself a trans woman.
Mine is more about gender expression. Clothes are important because of the way they make me feel but also removing body hair also makes me feel feminine. I don't like body hair - it looks dirty and unclean. Women always strike me as being cleaner than men is I guess it's part of that psychology. I love the image that some women portray and enjoy emulating them.
Katie x