Query

I DISCOVERED some women’s clothing which wasn’t mine in a drawer in the spare bedroom.

At first I thought my husband must be having an affair but they were a very large size.

Then the penny dropped – he has been wearing them himself.

I was so shocked it took me a while to say anything and initially he blamed me for pressure I put on him.

Then he blamed work stresses and life’s pressures generally.

We have been married for 20 years and have a teenage son. We are 48 and 49.

I don’t know what to do. The thought of it makes me feel sick.

Agony Aunt advice

Cross-dressing is more common than many realise. Dressing as a woman gives your husband temporary release from the pressures he feels as a man.

It has come as a shock to you but he’s harming no-one. It’s a shame he kept this secret from you – but maybe understandable?

If your relationship has been strong till now, say it’s hard but you’re trying to understand. My e-leaflet Worried About Cross-Dressing? details support.

But stress that for now he should not cross-dress while your son is around.

What would you advise?